God Is A Bullet

Just past midnight, waiting to see if there are any deaths to go pick up.  This will be my third straight on-call night.

My first night of on-call I couldn't get to sleep so I just stayed up, when a call came at 2:00 am.  It was a residential call, an elderly man died on the floor despite paramedics' attempts to save him.  The family was there and many were crying.  It must be heart wrenching to see your loved one die suddenly with strangers beating on their chest.  The first on-call driver, now an unofficial assistant supervisor by day, still takes calls at night during the week.  I met him at the house then at the mortuary to shelf the body.  I got back home at 3:30 am and tried to shut my eyes for a bit before morning.

I was awakened by a phone call from the same assistant supervisor, calling me to see where I am being 20 minutes late.  Shit.  I dressed quickly and got to work, and luckily he and everyone else was cool about it and we went about our day.

Last night things went just right.  There were two bodies to take to the airport right after my shift ended.  Cha-ching, easy money.  Went home and relaxed for a bit when the phone rang.  There were three bodies to be picked up.  Not all three needed two drivers but since the second one did, the assistant got permission for me to also get paid for all three.  We dropped one off at the airport then went to go pick up an old lady at a very nice boarding home.  The nurse told us she had scabies so we put on gowns and washed our hands thoroughly afterwards.

The assistant is a super cool guy and is highly concerned about pathogens and is religious about hygiene.  I like that he cares about that, since people at the old place really didn't give a shit about drivers' well-being.

Third body was at the hospital morgue.  We drove back to the mortuary and put away the bodies, and I was home going to bed by 11 pm.  And just like that, I made almost as much money in 24 hours as I would the whole week.

In the afternoon today I picked up a mother and son who died together in a house fire.  They weren't charred, likely dying from smoke inhalation.  The head of the adult son started bleeding when I brought it back, the blood was seeping through the zipper of the body bag.  Gross.

This morning I picked up a body from Mexico at our sister facility.  A young American got shot to oblivion, I mean riddled with bullets.  This is the first time for me seeing a human Swiss cheese up close.  This guy really got dumped on, I counted at least ten bullet holes, all sutured up individually.  My guess is 9 mm, possibly a machine gun.  Makes you wonder what kind of trouble (obviously) this guy got mixed up in.

I'm still waiting for a call, I think I'll close my eyes for a little while...

The Nightfly

My last removal before the weekend was a fetus.  This morning my first removal was a two-month old baby.  The weight of this baby was substantial, I'd guess around 10 lbs.  They performed an autopsy at the children's hospital, so it was sutured up just like those from the MEO.

Tonight I am trying something new at this job:  Second on-call driver.  I'm not the first to be called tonight, but if there's a two-man removal I'll go assist and get paid a flat rate.  The rate is much better than the old place.  I even drove the company van home so I can go tho the location directly.  I figure since I often stay up late practicing music for no pay I might as well get paid during my breaks.

Today was very mellow, and another driver and I discussed how fast the time went by despite being so un-busy.  He and I went on a residential call together, my first bathtub removal.  A man over 50 died in his bathtub and we had to lift him out.  He didn't smell, but he had his underwear on.  He had some bruising on his neck, so we mentioned that to our supervisor.  MEO was contacted and the body will go in for autopsy to see if there is more to this case.  The apartment was also upstairs so I'm glad there were two of us.

I'm glad my coworkers are fans of good coffee.  The crap they were drinking was unacceptable so I brought in a pound of Starbucks for all to share.  They love it (as do I) and hopefully we won't drink bad coffee again at work.

Behind the Sun

Rain and cold came in yesterday and it continued today.  Whenever drastic changes in weather occur, people tend to die more.  Or so it seems, and so I'm told by those who have been doing this longer than me.  I can do my job without blinking (much) now, but I still empathize with those who lost their loved ones.

There's been several babies (fetuses in particular) that came in the past two days.  Embalmers I work with tell me they come in in droves;  a whole bunch suddenly and then none for a while.  I went to go pick up a 25 week old fetus at women's hospital this morning, where they specialize in delivering babies.  I carried in a company bag, as there was no need for a gurney.  The morgue for fetuses is actually a regular household refrigerator with a padlock on it, and a curtain for privacy.

On the wall there were instructions printed, "Demise Procedures".  I wondered if fetal demise is medically considered death;  after all, it was never born to begin with.  They fill out death certificates for them, so I guess it is.  The supervisor was telling me fetuses die all the time, and that it's sad but common.  We unwrapped the little blanket so I can check its ID and attach our own tag.  Attaching a 2x4 tag with a ziptie  on its tiny ankle seemed excessive, but I have to follow procedure.  We wrapped it back up, put it inside the bag and I carried it out to the van like I just went shopping.

Twin sibling fetuses came in early this morning.  Seeing their little faces and still-forming bodies is still not easy for me.  These little beings did nothing wrong to deserve this.  But such is nature I guess.  I remember a security guard in the desert tell me that a hospital is a "Vortex of souls".  Makes sense.

Other drivers I work with tell me that I probably won't see the nasty cases like I have at the other place, mainly because the company is picky about what cases they take.  That's good, but they make the best stories I think.

I really like the people I work with.  Morale is good and that makes the workday go by so much easier.  I still feel like I'm just showing up to hang out and get paid.  Over all, there hasn't been that many removals, so I help out the embalmers and watch what they do, and it's very interesting.  Maybe after a year I may consider going into that field, but it's too early to say right now.

Back in Black

I'm back!  Thanks for your patience, I hope to restart what I started.  That means more about dead people.

A lot has happened since last month.  I'm still doing the same line of work but for a different company now.  Much better working environment at the new mortuary;  better equipment, better morale, just better all around.  Not that I regret the old place, but now that I can compare, yeah, that old place sucked.  Especially the owner, who is so consumed by greed he can't see straight.  Seeing the way he runs things employee turnover will always be high.

At the new place, I'm still doing the same job, removing dead people from homes, hospitals and MEO.  No lengthy crematory driving though, the crematory picks up the bodies.  It's a bigger facility with more bodies in the cooler.  The best part is that the people I work with are infinitely better than the old place.  I mean, my co-workers are actually a cooperative bunch, helping each other whenever possible and actually have manners.  I like that.

Today I removed a couple of bodies from a nursing home and a hospital.  Nothing new.  Management likes the fact that I know where all the places are.  I like the fact that the vans and gurneys are in great condition.  Air conditioning works just fine in the vans here.  I even did a two-man on-call run right after my shift, an old lady who died sitting in her Lay-Z-Boy.  Just like that man who died on his couch, we slid the gurney under her legs and dragged her onto it, nice and simple.

More to come...